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When it comes to deciding whether or not childcare is an option for your family, there are so many factors to consider. Many that you’re probably already well aware of and keep you up at night.
Finding the right childcare for twins comes with even more challenges.
In this article, I hash out the questions we asked ourselves when considering all of the options for our babies. I also explain in detail how we ultimately arrived at our decision and what option ended up being the best for our family.
I know for me, it was one of the hardest and most challenging decisions we’ve faced as a family, thus far.
Things we considered before making our decision
I work full time from home and my husband just changed career fields to become a teacher and a football/baseball coach. I love my career field and the fact that I get to work from home, but I also love my babies.
But, two years in to this daily grind and I knew something had to give.
I was not physically going to be capable of continuing down this path if I didn’t get some help with the girls or make a decision to quit my job.
Family help was not an option for us. And childcare for twins is expensive. I tossed and turned. I prayed for answers and direction.
I wanted to be a the best wife and mom I could be for our family, but I also couldn’t afford to lose my sanity or health in the process.
Here are some thoughts that ran through my mind when considering childcare for twins. Maybe these thoughts are running through your mind too…
Are we doing the right thing?
What if they’re better off at home?
Maybe I should quit my 9-5 job and be a full-time SAHM to raise them, but would we be able to afford life on one salary?
Will we make enough money if we both continue to work, to pay for childcare for twins?
Should we get another nanny, instead?
We tried a nanny once, but she was only able to come for two months and had to quit. How do I find another one we can trust to come into our home?
Our house is small, I feel like we’re on top of each other. I don’t even get my work done while the babies are still here in the house, even with a nanny.
I feel guilty. Babies don’t keep. Is sending them to daycare pushing them away too soon?
Am I going to regret not spending as much time as possible with them while they’re still little?
Maybe I should just keep them at home and continue to try and juggle my life as a mom and working full time from home.
No, I could really use a break. I’m at my wits end. I can’t even get my job done properly anymore let alone give them the best attention they deserve throughout the day while I’m trying to work at the same time. Nap times just aren’t long enough.
They deserve better. I don’t have the energy anymore. I’m spreading myself too thin.
Daycare might be good for us all. They could learn how to socialize with other children. They’ll probably do fun activities I haven’t been able to do with them at home because I never have the energy.
How do we find a good daycare we can trust?
What if the daycare workers are mean to them or mistreat them? How would we know? They aren’t old enough to talk to us and tell us what happened.
What if they’re sick all of the time? Daycares are like breeding grounds for viruses and bacteria.
Maybe a babysitter would be better? I could take them to their home. They could have personalized attention. But then they still wouldn’t get to socialize with other children.
What do we do?!
I can’t even tell you how many nights I sat around thinking about this. Praying about it. Trying to figure out the answers.
I have friends who swear by staying at home and raising their families and it seems amazing.
I have friends and family who decided to take their children to daycare as early as two months old and they never batted an eye.
I swore I’d never have my babies in a daycare. I just knew it wasn’t going to be an option for us. Well, let me tell you, things can change. And that’s okay.
Baby Steps
Our entire family went on a vacation to Florida and stayed at the Club Med Sandpiper Bay Resort when our girls were only 1.5. It was the girls’ first plane ride, first official vacation, and first opportunity for us to experience what childcare for twins could be like.
The resort had an on-site “Baby Club Med” where families could drop off their children for the day to go and play while they enjoyed some free-time together and had a break from parent responsibilities. It was so nice.
Again, I felt a little guilty – we’re on a family vacation and we should spend time together as a family with the girls. But for a couple of days out of that week, it was much needed.
I think the girls really blossomed from that whole experience. I think this helped my husband and I, be more open to the idea of daycare at home too.
If it weren’t for this experience, we may not have been able to make the jump into childcare outside of our home. It was like a baby step for us, but one that ultimately helped open our minds to the possibility.
How I began my research into childcare for twins
When we got home from that vacation, I started researching all of the daycares, Montessori schools and church childcare programs in our area.
I asked family members for recommendations. I posted in mom facebook groups to get the inside scoop on places in the area that were well-liked and the ones to stay away from.
Once I narrowed it down to about five-ten that I really liked, I then called to inquire about availability for two toddlers that fall.
To my surprise, some of them already had waitlists and several of them wouldn’t even allow names to be added to their waitlists because they were booked so far out! I started getting discouraged.
But, I finally found three places that I thought we should personally go tour.
One was right around the corner from our house, the second was a Montessori school that had good reviews from other moms, and the third was on the way to my in-laws, so it would be half way between their house and ours.
I highly recommend you take your twins with you when you go tour any daycare.
It might sound like a circus waiting to happen – and it could, but it’s extremely important to see their reactions to the place when you’re in there – and more importantly, to see the reactions of the staff to your kids.
Having the girls along with us, ultimately helped us make our final decision. Which is important, right? Since they’re going to be the ones going there after all.
Daycare Tour #1: Half-way to the in-laws
My husband and I loaded up the truck and drove 18 minutes to our first daycare tour. The tour was scheduled for 1pm during the center’s nap time. Each of us held a twin and walked inside to be greeted by a cheerful girl at a desk in the lobby.
Everything was well decorated for what you might expect of a Texas business establishment. She greeted the girls and they seemed to like her. The girls immediately became super chattery and excited. So, we all had good vibes.
We walked through the center and saw a gigantic play area with toys everywhere. It looked like fun, but it also looked a bit chaotic and slightly dirty. Like, maybe they didn’t wipe things down every day or as much as they should.
We entered into a hallway where the girl showed us to the two year-olds’ room where we were told, they would spend the majority of their day. It seemed small and dark. The kids were napping on floor mats. The lone daycare worker sitting on the floor watching the sleeping children looked like she was exhausted.
I asked how many kids to one adult ratio, and it seemed like an overwhelming number. I can’t handle my own two children some days, let alone 11 at once. And I think at certain times of day – at drop-off and pickup, that number would have been 22 to 1. Seemed like a red flag to me.
Our tour guide took us to the outdoor play area. High grass, a chain link fence that backed up to another business, and a few toys scattered about were the highlights. Not very inviting.
We had a feeling of uncertainty as we wrapped up our tour. There were things we liked – mainly the girl giving us the tour, and the big toy play area. But, a lot of cons too.
So, we took the enrollment packets they gave us to-go, and drove home. They reminded us that they only had two spots left for their two year old class, so we needed to fill out the enrollment packets quickly if we wanted to get in.
I knew that was probably true. But I didn’t panic because we still had two other places we wanted to tour first on our childcare for twins journey, and I was holding out hope for there to be something great.
Daycare Tour #2: The Montessori School
I’m not gonna lie, I had high hopes going into the tour for this Montessori school.
My SIL took her kids to Montessori school, and I had this overall impression that Montessori schools were the creme de la creme of childcare. This was before we went on our tour…after the tour, I had a whole new impression.
Remember me saying that it’s important to take your twins with you when you go on your child care center tours? This Montessori school is the reason I say that.
Our tour was scheduled for 4pm. My girls are normally still taking their late afternoon nap at that time. Therefore, they did not have their afternoon nap that day, and as you can imagine, they were already in a mood before we arrived.
One of my girls kicked off her sandals in the truck on the way there. I didn’t even bother to put them back on her because I figured I’d just be carrying her around the entire time on our tour anyways. So, my husband and I each scooped up a child and walked into the school.
We were immediately greeted by a woman, who was the owner. We entered through a long hallway with a glass window on the right, which looked in on a classroom of children no older than our girls.
All of the children were sitting quietly, cross-legged on the floor, hands to themselves, not a peep, watching a show on tv. Perfect little angels. “Wow,” I thought. “You mean they could make kids behave like this?”
We followed the woman down to the end of the hall where we entered into a large classroom with tiny tables and chairs, each place labeled with a child’s name. She explained to us that each child knew their own name and could recognize it.
They would come into the room each day, put their lunch boxes and waters up on a shelf where they belong.
The children would sit down at their chairs, fold their napkins, unzip their own lunch boxes and get their food out at lunch. They could open their water bottles themselves. All children were required to have the same style of water bottle.
They also played on individual mats or “play stations.” Two children to a mat at one time.
The children could only play with the toy they were playing with until it was time to go do the next activity. They couldn’t get up and change play mats, or join another child’s play mat whenever they wanted, they had to stay put on their own mat until they were told otherwise.
I thought it was amazing that these children could all perform these instructions and obediently “play” like that at this age.
It was obvious that our girls did not get the same cheerful, chattery vibe from this woman or this place like they did from our first daycare tour. Instead of smiles and happy chatter, they turned into raging hyenas.
Almost immediately when we entered the classroom, the twin I was holding went into full on freak-out mode. Whether it was the atmosphere, the woman, or the fact that she could sense our tension, I’ll never know.
She started flailing about in my arms, trying to escape. Finally, the woman, looking a little shocked and disgusted, said I could put her down if I wanted to. So I did. And off she went!
Running around the room in her bare feet, trying to escape out of the first crack in an open door she could find. I was in shock. My husband took both girls back out to the truck to sit with them, at that point, until I could finish the tour.
But, here is what I learned from this tour–not every daycare or school is the same. Not even Montessori to Montessori.
The people/staff make the place what it is. The environment, the overall methods they use, and the structure is not always a one-size-fits-all for every child.
Just because this Montessori wasn’t the right fit for our girls, does not mean that the other children in attendance didn’t love it. Those moms raved about that place. So it was obviously a great fit for some families. It just wasn’t for us.
And we actually wouldn’t even get to make that decision for ourselves (even though we would have decided against it).
The owner said, “I just don’t think they’re ready to come here.” I thought, “You’re right, lady. You’re right. They’ll never be ready for this place.”
So, if you have a Montessori in your area and you have your heart set on it, definitely give it a chance and go take the tour. It could be the perfect fit! Or, it might not.
You just never know until you go. But as for us, our quest to find the right childcare for twins continued.
Daycare Tour #3: Right Around the Corner
I was hoping that the third time would be the charm with this daycare, since it was the last one on our tour list, and closest to home. My husband and I took the girls for our tour at 1:30pm, during the center’s nap time.
We entered the building through a small lobby area next to an office where a girl greeted us. She took us into the main area of the daycare – which was HUGE.
It was open and airy, like a big gigantic gym that had been partitioned off in sections for each class age group. It wasn’t overcrowded at all. In fact that day, there weren’t even any two year olds attending.
We set the girls down, and they had so much room to run and play. They loved it. We loved it. They had areas for circle time and little tables to sit at and color or do activities and eat their lunches. Everything looked well-kept.
The outdoor play area was very well built with a lot of area to run around and equipment that was age-appropriate, and in the shade.
The shade is a big deal if you’re in Texas. I was so thrilled. And to think it was right around the corner from our house!
It would take me a max of five minutes to get there if anything should ever happen. They also had cameras where you could check in on your kiddos whenever you wanted throughout the day from your phone.
The girls working there all seemed really nice.
This was it! We found our daycare. I was actually super excited for the girls to start here. I had a feeling they were really going to like it. They didn’t even want to leave to go home after our tour.
In Conclusion
I guess the most important advice I can give you when deciding whether or not childcare for twins is an option, is to really weigh the pros and cons for your own family and situation.
Do what’s right for your family. Not what someone outside of your family thinks is right for your family. And, then pray about it. Seriously. Sometimes the answers aren’t always obvious. Trust your instincts.
If you decided that childcare is the answer, make your list and go tour each place with your kiddos first, before you apply. Stay open minded. Pay attention to the vibe you get from each place, including the staff who work there.
Then, check to see if your state has a website that lists any citations the center may have received.
In Texas, you can visit the Texas Health and Human Services website to search all childcare facilities, see whether or not they are licensed, if they have any reports, incidents, and if they pass their inspections.
This really gave us peace of mind.
The Update: How It’s Going Now
We are currently two months in to daycare life, and I have to say, some of my fears about daycare did come true.
Mainly, the fact that the girls come home with a new cold every week. We have yet to make it through an entire full week of attendance.
Because I work from home, if they aren’t feeling 100%, I don’t take them.
This actually makes it worse for my work load on these days because I literally get nothing else done. My kids come first.
But, I know other parents aren’t able to keep their children home like this. And they don’t. They take them to daycare even when they’re sick because they have to go to work.
And that’s why there is a never-ending cycle of boogers that thrive in daycare. It’s a double-edged sword.
But, I will say that on the days they have attended, they love it.
They’ve opened up and blossomed. The girls are much more talkative.
They’ve learned social skills and how to interact with others that I can’t teach them by myself at home.
So, in that regard I am glad we are trying this out. And it really is amazing how much I can accomplish in my work and around the house during a day while they are there. So, for that I am grateful.
1-Year Update
The girls have been attending the same daycare now for a year and they have grown and developed so much during their time at school.
I am 100% thankful and have no regrets about enrolling them in the daycare that we chose.
The second “cold/flu season” gets so much better.
Their immune systems are built up and they are no longer getting sick every week. So that aspect will improve after the initial first few months.
They are getting to participate in activities that I never would have thought to do with them. And they’re making friends. Learning how to follow instructions (not just from mom and dad!) and socializing with other children is such a huge blessing.
At this time I can confidently say that I am happy with our decision.
How to Afford Childcare for Twins?
If you’re nervous about the high cost of childcare these days, you are in good company. At some point, sacrifices might need to be made in order to maintain a life/work balance.
Here are some ideas, below, that might help you save money, while still receiving great childcare for twins:
- Hire a Nanny – rates are often lower than daycare. We used Care.com to find our nanny and had a great experience!
- Work part-time so that you only need to pay for childcare part-time
- Mother’s Day Out Programs – some communities offer these at local churches or other organizations. They are usually free or very cost friendly, but only occur 2-3 days per week for a couple of hours at a time.
- At-home daycares – sometimes these are more cost effective and will have a smaller adult:baby ratio
- Ask a family member to help out – Grandma? Aunt? Cousin? Sister? Sometimes, if we’re fortunate, a kind family member will come to the rescue!
- Apply for financial aid or start a go-fund me.
Items We Can’t Live Without for Daycare
There are a few items that we can’t live without for daycare. The first being the girls’ nap mats.
(As an Amazon Associate we may earn from qualifying purchases.)
Nap Mats with Included Pillow and Lovey Pocket
The kids sleep on floor mats or cots (yes, believe it or not, they eventually adjust and learn to sleep on a slightly raised cot that sits on the floor and has no sides like a crib–and they stay there for an entire two hours!)
The nap mat we use (see below) is machine washable, has an attached blanket, a removable pillow, and y’all – my favorite part that just warms my mommy heart – it has a pocket for a stuffed animal or lovey!
This makes me feel warm and fuzzy just knowing that the girls will have their favorite lovey animal waiting for them at nap time, all tucked up inside their nap mat blanket.
There is a place to write their name on the outside of the mat (even if you don’t get the personalized embroidered name option) and when nap time is over, the whole thing rolls up like a sleeping bag and is easy to transport home.
The daycare staff love it too!
Click here to view the Urban Infant Tot Cot Kids Nap Mat on Amazon >
(More colors/patterns available)
Personalized Backpacks
The next items we use daily are individual backpacks with their names on them.
This really helps me be organized at drop off and pick up. I can toss their water bottles in the side pocket and anything that might need washed and taken home inside.
I can wear the backpacks out of the building, so I have my hands free to deal with wrangling my kids into the car.
The Urban Infant Store who also makes the nap mats we love, has their own line of matching backpacks, lunch bags, and crayon bags that all coordinate, clip together, and can be personalized.
I just can’t get enough of these and how thoughtful the design is behind everything they’ve created!
Their backpacks even have a pocket for your kiddos artwork that they will inevitably bring home from school to hang on your fridge! I’m just so impressed with this entire line.
Click here to view the Urban Infant Toddler Backpack on Amazon >
(More colors/patterns available)
Coordinating Insulated Lunch Bags
I mentioned these above. And although we didn’t need the lunch bags for our daycare because their meals are provided, I do love having this option for the girls when they start school and need to bring a lunch. Or when they go for a visit at Nonni and Peepaw’s house.
And I LOVE that everything can literally clip together! The more hands-free we can be, the easier it is! They even fit Bento Boxes.
Click here to view the coordinating Urban Infant Yummie Kids Lunch Box on Amazon >
(More colors/patterns available)
Coordinating Clip-On Crayon Carrying Case
Again, I am so impressed with the things this brand has created to make life easier for parents!
They have a crayon carrying case that matches the prints offered on the backpacks and the lunchbags! They even include 10 non-toxic crayons with the case.
This is so convenient – especially for clipping them on to your purse or diaper bag for going into restaurants or pediatrician appointments or anywhere a wait-time might be invevitable and you need some activities.
(More colors/patterns available)
Spill-Proof Stainless Steel Water Bottle with Straw or Nipple
The water bottles that I mentioned above, and we absolutely love, are from Pura.
They keep the girls’ drinks colder longer, are 100% plastic-free, dishwasher safe, and eco friendly.
I also love that you can change the bottle nipple out for a straw so it can be used for a long time.
I do advise you to get the silicone bumpers that Pura designs and sells separately to put on the bottom of your water bottles.
This protects the stainless steel from getting dented if your child should happen to drop their bottle from a high chair, for instance. (We learned this one the hard way!)
Click here to view all Pura bottles on Amazon >
(More colors available)
Click here to view the Pura bottle silicone bumpers on Amazon >
I hope this article was helpful in guiding you through the process of choosing childcare for your twins!
It really is a journey, and we’re still learning new things every day. Best of luck to you and your family as you start this new chapter and discover what works best for you!
If you need additional help, or have questions about daycare for twins and more, reach out to us in our private online community, here.
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